And after a real long break i am back to my blog. Started it all by going thorugh some articles, mine and others. There is a charm in creatvity. I love to read, it broadens our horizon and that's what i love the most about reading. Today my wandreing mind perferred to choose the FEAR zone, felt like writing about it. May be it will help overcome mine :)

Human emotions are complex, guided by many factors and one of the factors being the obvious, FEAR. Fear makes as well as breaks. Fear does not necessarily impart negativity. It does good in its own fearful way, ha ha !!!

Well, fear has been both positive and negative for me. As i retrospect, i feel grateful to the fears i had ... they made me focussed. Sometimes the fear of losing something makes us understand how much we value it  while at times this fear makes us overdo creating a mess. But one thing that i have realised is that everyone has fear of one thing or the other but let it not have its cotrol over us, rather let it guide us.

The Brighter Side :)

I have believed in being bold and courageous, I was born not to live a cornered life but to roam freely, learn through experiences in life, stumble down and then stand up by myself and move ahead. Being strong is my only option. When I am committed I am determined yet I am born to keep flying, see the world and explore, I can never be stagnant. 

setting free . . .

when u set something free, it is  a great feeling; you feel as if you have given its life back and now you no longer have the regret that you were trying to hold it in chains.....you might have a sense of being stranded for sometime but once you realise it was never yours, you get a deep satisfaction that whatever you have left now is all yours and just yours.... there is nothing hidden, no fakes and no regrets, you can then boast on whatever you have because you know all you have just belongs to you solely.

PS this way one is not setting someone or something else free but oneself.

have i turned into stone???

when i desired i was left lonesome
now i don't desire...

i left things behind
n now seeing things trying to  get back to me
doesn't affect me...
have i turned to stone??

people change, do feelings change too??
whirlwinds seem to destroy me
when i knew i couldnt really let go,
why did i??
n now.....why do i wish to get back to the same track...

getting weak i have been working hard enough
m trying to hold back and let go...
still those moments are vivid
i could actually never erase them...
they are the only assets i have

and now i have hidden them in the deepest corner of my heart
dared to hide them within me so that they don't ever show up in my mind
trying to be the way i never wanted to be
trying to be the way u came up to me
have i turned to stone??

don't come to me to test me
don't try to make me weak
i have now moved on too far
i now don't wish to get sick

 i still have hopes n desires
i shall keep flowing as ever,
i have me for me
lonely i shall be never...

in love . . .

After my classes were over, i used to stay with a friend of mine and we used to have all those normal talks which youngsters do.....and one fine day, she talked about this whole charismatic feeling of being in love.

Being in love, she said, is the most amazing feeling. There is someone who takes over you all the time. Its magical, you have his hangover all the time and you smile when his thought pops your mind. You get that sudden impulse when you think of him. Loving someone and being loved by someone is always a blessing. People quest for happiness and different people have different  opinions about getting it. When in love with someone, watching that person smile gives you the greatest happiness. This whole love thing is like a euphoria, I accept that it does give you those blues at times, but along with it, once you get over it, your relation gets far more stronger. Love has its own transformations, its own highs and lows, those fights, break ups just for the sake of it and then again getting back together, they are simply incomparable. One single person gets hold of all  your actions.....your life indeed. You get so into that person that it makes you strive to do better in life, you have a dream to live happily for the rest of you life in the arms of that person and you get that zeal to do better in life. Love is powerful yet fragile, simple yet complicated, all smiles yet got its blues...... you get to know all of it when you are in love, she smiled as see said it and the brightness in her face spoke what she felt, how much she loved her special guy whom she preferred the HERO of her life.

And then, later that day, all she said stroke my mind once again, that whole feeling of being IN LOVE....LOVE, a puzzle, which, to some is an intense emotion guiding to betterment, to some merely a feeling that is ever changing and never holding grip to one single person but flowing with many transits on the way. Some have reached love's acumen and stayed happy together, grown old together holding hands of each other whilst some have destroyed themselves stating love and betrayal as a reason and to some love exists as simple as an abstarct feeling as light as feather. I wonder what exactly love is, as an observer I feel it is different to different people....I guess it's an amazing feeling, having the presecence of someone who cares about you is simply inexplicable but at the same time making it last is a tough job. One needs to have that dedication, understanding and freedom, and most imprtantly in this era when SELF comes before ANYONE ELSE, a good communication and expression with a dose of honesty would do the perfect job in lasting the chemistry and togetherness between the SPECIAL TWOSOME forever. And, how could I not mention the cliche- "Its easier to fall in love, but to stay in love forever and make it work, it requires a lot of effort" but it is also well known, WHERE THERE IS A WILL, THERE IS A WAY.......Cheers to LOVE and all those TRULY< MADLY< DEEPLY in this wonderful thing called LOVE  ^_^

<3 <3 <3 

subtle reality

suddenly and unexpectedly,
you give me a deep pang

and its not your presence but your absence
that gives me an intense hang

is it addiction or madness,
or this emptiness and sadness....
no motion, only pause
no end, only wait
am i nothing but a mere picture
with eyes wide open giving a vacant stare?

is that stare a WAIT?
a wait to console myself,
a wait to confuse myself,
or something to corrode myself...

suddenly and unexpectedly
i wonder
WHY DO YOU GIVE ME A DEEP PANG............................


oct 22, 2012

despite all...

despite all that happens
despite all complications
despite all barriers
i still think about you

u made me a writer,
a poet, a scribbler
i thank you for all of these
i now feel so complete

i cannot say i love you
i cannot let you go
neither can i forget you
nor do i wish so

i have loved you silently
this feeling stays hidden inside me
u have loved me the same way
somewhere i know u need me

meant to be away
meant to be unknown
but all i wish is cherish this feeling forever

i could never stop thinking about you
           never stop writing for you
despite all the barriers.....